Sunday, February 19, 2012

A Star is Born

I wrote this a few days ago during a sleepless night. Hope you all enjoy.

A star is born.

This is dedicated to every boy and girl out there who lives like i do. Who has decided that they rather give everything and gain nothing, instead of growing old with everyone and everything. This is to the people out there who dedicate their lives to our sport. Who publish, who push, who bolt, who lead. This is for every boy and girl who has gotten up before the sunrise to work for no pay. Who would rather remain nameless, who would rather do things alone. Who give their time and money for no reward and no claim. Who stand on the threshold. Between the real and the fake, between reality and fantasy. On the fine line entre security and uncertainty, one foot over the status void of truth and logic, and one hand into the unknown. Between dream and wakefulness.

It’s the long days and cold nights, the warm mornings and not enough water. The slacker lifestyle, and the hard work it takes to keep living it. It’s being dirty and not wanting a shower. Its understanding how awesome hot water actually is. It’s the daunting tasks of keep your car maintained, but the Check Engine light that costs you your dinner beer. It’s climbing to much, and climbing to long. Its getting injured, and waiting for the injury to heal. It’s explaining the crux, but not giving the entire beta. It’s knowing everything, but still failing. It’s knowing nothing, and succeeding. It’s crimping, throwing, burning, hurting, breathing to hard, and not enough. It’s being out there when you know you should be elsewhere. It’s the future ahead, uncertain and bleak, so you can do, today. It’s not having anything, but having more than anyone. Its being competitive, but still cheering your enemy on. Its dreaming of tomorrow, when today is over. Thinking about yesterday, before the day is through. It's carrying a broken heart, but knowing it was not meant to be, keeping faith, even though fate has other plans.

It’s the dark night so thick against the sheer magnitude of the moon that it borders on translucent blue. It’s the majestic brilliance high in the heavens bringing out the shine of the exploding planets. It’s the air that sits tranquil, cold, bordering on freezing, the ice forming away on the ground, roofs, grass and the sands of the earth. The palm trees high up on the steep walls sheltering lizards, snails, butterflies and scorpions, keeping them safe from predators, much like our trucks keep us safe from ours, tonight.

It’s waiting for the suns return. Waiting for the earth to rotate, for the other half of the planet to go to sleep so we can wake and admire their sunset as our sunrise. Accepting the warmth of its simple yet crucial task as it undoes that very action elsewhere. It’s sleeping in fresh air, in silence and in calm. Closing our eyes hoping we do not wake before the sun is readily available. Sleeping close to our loved ones, our dogs, our pillows or the night’s new companion.

When the time comes to wake, we stretch. We yawn and moan, shriek and toss in our comfort, all so well knowing what the day will bring. Our fingertips still raw, our heads still scared, our harnesses and shoes still humid form the day before. Yet we strive, we endure, we capture and let go, we freeze in the face of blindness and as quickly, we become human again.

It’s everything and its anything to keep us from becoming one of them. One more day, just one more night, so we can postpone pushing the Wheel. It’s forgetting about Facebook and emails, texts and cell service, it’s forgetting about mom, cause mom understands.

It’s living the dream, while dreaming of what would have been. It’s that moment, the last inch and that last gasp before it all ends, to begin at square one again, tomorrow.

It’s a place where you lose yourself and you find yourself.

Where everything falls apart.

Where everything comes together.

It is growth.

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